Exodus... Let's Talk About It.

Wow. Where do I even begin? I began the Bible In a Year plan on the Bible app at the end of 2020 because I felt so strongly that I needed to quit this cycle I had been in for so long called "flip to whatever you feel lead to flip to," and while that's not necessarily a bad way to spend time with God (and boy, did God still move)... it was aimless. And with the aimless year that 2020 was all together, I started to really crave structure. I started to feel like my desire to know & to love Jesus was lacking a huge thing. A thing that I hold in high regard in my earthly relationships, so why was I not holding it as important in my relationship with my Heavenly Father; the lover of my soul; my sustainer? That thing: intentionality.

So, how could I begin to prioritize intentionality in my relationship with God? The Holy Spirit convicted me in those moments: read the Bible in a Year. Get to know all of me. You can't speak on my behalf if you don't know me fully. And y'all, while I was so thankful for that revelation, I pushed it away for a long while, about 3-4 months, because to be really transparent: I've never been very good at staying consistent, so you can imagine that I was VERY intimidated. How was I supposed to stay perfectly consistent this in order to complete this on time? Is it dishonoring to God if I don't finish in exactly a year? No, not at all. Jesus didn't die for me to be perfectly consistent or perfectly anything. Jesus died so that I could be His child and pursue a genuine, authentic, intentional relationship with Him. I just was becoming so aimless, that I needed a plan. An intentional plan. Once the Lord convicted me of those truths... I began the Bible In a Year. (and I have a confession to make: I'm on day 53 when I should be on day 131).

I know... "Jess, get to the point!" Alright, here it is: God's love for you is intentional, so love Him with intentionality right back. It doesn't have to be perfect or look perfect, that's an impossible standard to live up to. Wanna know a secret? that's why there's grace. So, pray about having a plan to guide your time with Lord in scripture and be intentional. Love Him the hardest you can love Him. Did you know that is God's deepest desire? That YOU know Him and love Him with everything that you have. As much as we want to be known and loved, he wants to be known and loved so much more. So, love Him hard with your intentionality and your relationship with the Father will grow so much sweeter SO FAST! Trust me.

Anyway, that being said, let's move on to the topic of the evening (or morning or afternoon) shall we: E X O D U S. Let's talk about it.

When I began the Bible in a Year, I hit the ground RUNNING. I flew through Genesis in the first month and a half, not skipping a beat. Genesis: SO cool! Who knew right?!? And honestly, y'all, a huge part of why I was excited to read the Bible cover to cover was that I desire so deeply to expand my faith beyond the New Testament because, let's be real: we're scared of the Old Testament because we've gotten way too comfortable in the New Testament. We're afraid that if we move out of the subjects of joy and acceptance and freedom and power of authority in the New Testament and move into the harder subjects of instructions and commandments and sacrifice of the Old Testament, we're not going to like our faith very much anymore. We'll be forced to realized that we can't live a buffet faith; we can't pick and choose parts of the Bible that is easy and peaceful, and ignore the hard and the harsh. Friends-- we need to stop being just New Testament Believers. We need to start being Bible Believers.

So anyway, (someone get me off my rabbit trails plz haha, I promise I'm getting to the point soon!), I began Exodus over the New Year-ish and at first, it seemed like a drag. It was all "the Israelites are slaves because Pharaoh is mean" and "ope, the Israelites are complaining again," "oh, yep, there goes Moses insisting that he can't speak for God." (if you grew up in church-- you know!). Anyway, I was beginning to feel aimless again and began to get bored with the Word because I wasn't receiving a life-changing revelation every time I opened my bible. But like any good Christian (lol), I kept reading to check off that reading plan each day. Then guess what? School started.

By this time, I was nearing Exodus 16. Let me set the scene: the Israelites, led by Moses are setting out for Elim, near Mount Sinai and (here's that Sunday school knowledge), the Israelites begin complaining because they were in the wilderness with nothing to eat. The Lord heard the complaints of the Israelites and told Moses, "“Look, I’m going to rain down food from heaven for you. Each day the people can go out and pick up as much food as they need for that day. I will test them in this to see whether or not they will follow my instructions. 5 On the sixth day they will gather food, and when they prepare it, there will be twice as much as usual.”

STORY CONTINUES, VERSE 6: So Moses and Aaron said to all the people of Israel, “By evening you will realize it was the Lord who brought you out of the land of Egypt. 7 In the morning you will see the glory of the Lord, because he has heard your complaints, which are against him, not against us. What have we done that you should complain about us?” 8 Then Moses added, “The Lord will give you meat to eat in the evening and bread to satisfy you in the morning, for he has heard all your complaints against him. What have we done? Yes, your complaints are against the Lord, not against us.”

Alright, let me set my scene: I'm entering my last semester at TJC (I know... insane!). I had so many mixed emotions about this semester because while I'm getting to the funnest part of an associate's degree in Journalism (aka actually doing the thing and applying what I've learned over the past year since switching my major), I'm also having to take a statistics course pre-transferring to Texas A&M because they require Journalism majors to do math for whatever reason?!? (ps. no shade and all the love for the Ags, every bit of shade on the math--GIG EM!). Anyway, going into this semester, I was preparing for the funnest and most dreadful semester all at once. So bittersweet. So many emotions. Joy but also fear (because I do NOT understand math at all and BARELY passed pre-cal and college algebra). Confidence but also insecurity (again, was SO terrified of tanking my GPA, thus evoking my rejection to A&M). Full trust and faith (in Jesus) but full doubt at the same time.

So, as I'm taking my time reading through Exodus 16 (meaning I read like 1 verse before my alarm went off telling me to get myself to statistics), the Holy Spirit lays on my heart: you're gonna have to pray through this class. Oh no! This is about to be hard. So, out of obedience, I prayed over this class out loud in my car on the way to school that morning and then again on Wednesday for understanding and wisdom.

By Wednesday morning, I had read the passage in chapter 16 that we just talked about and here's what I noticed: although the Israelites complained and doubted the Lord's faithfulness in the wild, He still blessed them abundantly with twice as much food as usual. He does the same with us daily. After praying over my statistics class, the Holy Spirit was present in my class with me, and I actually began to understand the material and feel at peace with the semester. Praise God! He's done it before, He's doing it now, and He'll continue to do it over and over and over again, because just like the Israelites starving in the wilderness: I became distracted and overwhelmed at (so I thought) what I was lacking. I wanted to rely on myself for understanding, which caused my life to feel chaotic even though I had invited the Lord in, but God was faithful. Even though I don't always recognize it or just plain don't pay attention to it, He is still working the good on my behalf. He is always walking with me, being faithful even when I am unfaithful. He is steadfast in His faithfulness and by the presence of the Holy Spirit, I can truly have peace in the midst of the chaos.

Friends-- God doesn't need our faithfulness to Him to propel His faithfulness toward us. He is always faithful. Steadfast. Present, even when you don't recognize or pay attention, because that's His character. He sees our unfaithfulness and still chooses to pursue us and bless us beyond what we deserve. Let that sink in.

Fast forward, now, to Feb. 1: I'm in line to get my car inspected and I'm listening to the That Sounds Fun Podcast with Annie F. Downs and Lauren Daigle (HIGHLY RECOMMEND!) and as I'm in a spirit of worship listening to there conversation, the Holy Spirit leans in and says: I want you to remain in Exodus for the remainder of the year OR until I tell you to move.

(At this point, I'm soaking up everything in Exodus and taking my sweet time reading through because there is SO MUCH to unpack!) And I instantly questioned "God, what about the Bible in a Year? What about my schedule to have intentional time with you?" Would you just trust me? Still, I was doubtful and persistent on my way. "And God, my word for the year is gratitude, which you gave to me, remember? What the heck is there to learn about gratitude in Exodus?" Trust me.

So, guess what? Every victory belongs to the Lord, amen?! That being said, if anybody needs me, I'll be in Exodus until further notice! So wait Jess, why are you telling us all of this? At the beginning of the year I promised you guys a two part blog post with my word for the year being one post and my scripture of the year being another. And I say all of this to say: Coming into 2021 and as I began to plan out this two part blog, I felt lead to speak a completely different verse over my year. But, with each day I'm living this year, the Lord's faithfulness has been amplified and it has been so through Exodus.

Let me be clear: I'm not necessarily committing to dedicate my 2021 to the book of Exodus, I'm just simply abiding in it for now and will continue to live this year by the theme of God's faithfulness.

I pray that what I've learned so far would draw you near to God's heart again and that you would take a moment to recognize His faithfulness in your life again. Where is He continuing to work the good?

There you have it, friends! My scripture (for now) I'm speaking over my 2021 & what I've been learning. GO !! READ !! EXODUS !! SO !! SO !! GOOD !!

Love you lots,

Jess :)